Comparisons
Do you compare yourself to others? To their progress, to their success? It may be motivating, but it may also be defeating. If you see on this blog that someone did 10,000 words in a week and you did 100, do you give up?
Don’t do that.
You can’t compare yourself to everyone else. You can only compare yourself to…yourself. I know it’s hard because I do it myself sometimes. We writers can be very competitive. That’s one of the best things about this 70 day writing challenge. But you have to walk a careful line between allowing this challenge to motivate you to succeed, and letting it beat you into failure.
I write full time. My children are grown and gone. I have no one to answer to except my husband and myself, and he does a damn fine job of taking care of himself and doesn’t need me to do things for him. If someone who works a full time job and has small children at home to take care of tries to compare themselves to me, how defeating is that? I have 15 hours a day to write. If you have to eek out an hour a day to even attempt to write, don’t compare your output to mine.
Don’t compare yourself to anyone. Set your own goals because only you know what you’re capable of doing. Then push yourself to achieve those goals. Don’t worry what everyone else is doing. Succeed or fail at your own goals, no one else’s.
March 20th, 2008 at 1:11 am
I needed to hear that. Thanks, Jaci.
March 20th, 2008 at 3:12 am
Yeah, I appreciated that too.
March 20th, 2008 at 6:14 am
Beautifully put Jaci!
Cole
March 20th, 2008 at 8:01 am
Jaci, I think this point is VERY important.
That was one of my biggest issues the first time I did Sven. I had just started writing at the time, and saw this as a huge opportunity to really push myself to see if I had it in me to be a writer. In addition to my full time job AND part time job.
Every week my goal was to write 500 words a day. That’s it. Sometimes I just couldn’t manage it because I was too tired from everything else going on. So it was frustrating, come Sunday, when I thought - yes! I managed 2000 words this week! Woot! - and others posted with - I have been SUCH a slacker and I’m totally disappointed in myself. Only 20,000 words this week? I should be ashamed of myself!
But the important thing really is to remember that they probably have the TIME to get more than that in. If you only have 20 minutes here, 20 minutes there, and you USE those 20 minutes and manage 1000 words for the week, AWESOME. If you have 9 hours a day to devote for writing, kudos to you! You’ll probably be done way before me! But that doesn’t lessen what I do, and it doesn’t lessen what you do.
Just BICHOK no matter how long you have.
Early caffeine rush for me, apparently.
March 20th, 2008 at 8:11 am
[…] I’m over at the 70 Days of Sweat blogging about Comparisons. It’s hard for a writer not to compare his or herself to others, […]
March 20th, 2008 at 8:15 am
You are my best friend today, Jaci. This is the perfect, perfect, perfect post for me lately. I’ve been working 56 hour work weeks and yet I’m making the time to write. I feel, at times, like I’m not writing enough as everyone around me writes way more than I do, but after a 12-hour workday yesterday, I managed to write 600 words. I felt such a huge sense of accomplishment, and this morning I ready your post. You are my very best friend today.
March 20th, 2008 at 8:22 am
600 words after a 12 hour workday? Marissa, you’re my hero. I don’t know how you do it. There’s a reason I didn’t start seriously writing until after I quit my full time career, until after my kids were grown. I know many writers do it and do it well, but I couldn’t. I admire all of you who have full time jobs, or small children and manage to write. You all amaze me.
and Kate, sometimes I think I’ve done well with my weekly goal and someone will always do more than me and I’ll think…well crap. it still wasn’t enough. It is enough if I meet my own goal. Satisfy yourself. Meet your own goals. That’s all you should be striving for.
March 20th, 2008 at 8:27 am
[…] a side note, Jaci Burton wrote a lovely post today on the 70 Days of Sweat blog about one of my biggest faults - comparing yourself to other writers. Check it […]
March 20th, 2008 at 9:07 am
How did you know I needed to read this? I work full-time and it’s a pretty stressfull job. Thanks you are truly the best.
Greta
March 20th, 2008 at 9:46 am
So totally true! All you have is your life, all the envy of someone else’s schedule in the world will only make you resentful but it won’t give you more time in the day or more words written. It just makes you bitter.
March 20th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
Echoing what others said… I always compare myself and it’s a nasty habit I should break, so thanks for the reminder!
March 20th, 2008 at 4:17 pm
Lord I swear the not-so-small children are worse than the small ones. I mean the small ones just watch Dora…the big ones play Guitar Hero day after day after day on spring break and then stay up late playing Halo online, talking and talking….er anyway. Great post hon!!!!
March 20th, 2008 at 10:38 pm
Thanks Jaci. Your post really hit home for me. *hugs* It’s good to be back in the swing of things again. Looking forward to Sunday’s post!
March 24th, 2008 at 9:52 pm
Oh, thanks for this.